Having a successful morning routine is all the buzz right now. Dr. Whitney breaks down why typical morning routines don’t work for her (or a lot of moms) and gives you an alternative that still allows you to have the benefits but none of the strain and guilt
Key takeaways:
- Typical morning routines for moms usually involve getting up several hours earlier than everyone else and don’t allow for families where that’s just not possible. They’re generally so involved and have so many forms of self-care within them that if you have a morning where your kiddo wakes up early (that’s every day over here), then you end up feeling defeated and angry when something doesn’t work out.
- An alternative is a daily ritual that you go through that gives you time to yourself and allows for a moment of reflection. And that can happen whenever you need it to. Whenever it actually CAN happen. Just like you’d plan your morning routine, you need to make space in your schedule to allow for this to happen.
- Why a DAILY ritual? It reminds us that we are the most important things in our own lives and if we aren’t supporting ourselves, we’ll end up resentful and burnt out because we’ll constantly be giving of ourselves instead of actually receiving anything. If we can receive for ourselves in a consistent way, then we’ll have more bandwidth, more time, more energy, and more mental capacity to be giving to OTHERS in a consistent way.
- What should it look like? Literally anything that allows you to be alone, quiet with your feelings, and to turn inward and practice mindful self-compassion and radical acceptance. Or even to just let your mind wander and be with yourself (to remind you how great you are!) It can also be something structured with journal pages from The Artist’s Way or meditations and mantras from the Mindful Mamas Club App.
- When should I do it? Some people like to do it in the morning simply because it’s a season that they’re in where that works for them. Great! If not, maybe it’s when you go on a walk. Or in the shower (with the door locked!), as you’re driving home from work, taking an extra 5 minutes in the garage or driveway, or on your lunch hour when you decide not to check emails, but instead focus on yourself.
- How long should it take? 5-10 minutes of calm, unrushed time
- How do you make time for this in the day? This is where the Centered Life Blueprint comes into play. Decide to put yourself in the center of your life. That could look like putting aside efficiency or productivity for just a few minutes because you want to honor what you know your body and mind need. Or deciding that you’re only going to check your phone 4 times a day. Or planning a very simple meal one day a week to give yourself a little bit more margin. Or delegating tasks that don't need to be done by you.
Maybe that’s decluttering the stuff in your house so you spend less time cleaning up and more time with you. Or saying no to being on committees or opportunities that are not going to serve you well. Or boundaries on tech about when you’re responding to people.
It starts with deciding that you are worth taking care of. When that doesn’t happen, you turn into a burnt out stress ball. And burnt out, stressed out women have a really hard time being the best mom to their kids. Or wives to their husbands. Or business owners.
About the Episode: There’s so much parenting advice out there, and most of it doesn’t matter nearly as much as the internet wants you to think. (Seed oils? We have bigger fish to fry.) In this solo episode, Dr. Whitney gets back to basics and shares the six evidence-based parenting principles she focuses on as a pediatrician, the ones she dug into with a leading child development researcher. She also shares how these play out in real life as a mom of two neurodivergent kids, because guidance only helps if it actually fits your family. Key takeaways: Be sensitive and responsive. Simple practices like mirroring your child’s emotions and “serve and return” interactions build a loving, trusting foundation. Dr. Whitney shares how a Halloween decorating session turned into a deep conversation about religion once she slowed down and got curious. Meet kids where they are, especially at their worst. Drawing on Tina Payne Bryson, co-author of The Whole-Brain Child , Dr. Whitney explains that soothing a meltdown isn’t giving in. It’s letting your child know they’re not alone in a big feeling. Model self-regulation, and repair when you lose it. Self-regulation predicts academic success better than IQ. The goal isn’t staying calm all the time, it’s understanding why you got dysregulated, coming back to baseline, and offering yourself some self-compassion. Set limits for your kids and yourself. Every child’s needs are different (screen time affects Dr. Whitney’s two daughters very differently), but all kids need limits, and so do parents. Taking time for yourself models something healthy. Aim for authoritative, not permissive. High expectations paired with warmth and grace is the sweet spot. “Gentle parenting” can blur into permissiveness, which research shows is as harmful as authoritarian parenting. Protect unstructured time. Kids need boredom and free play to become self-directed. For ADHD and autistic kids, Dr. Whitney recommends offering a few options and letting kids choose. Support internal motivation. Using a “mirrors facing outward” image from her own therapist, Dr. Whitney explains why we want kids to trust their own instincts rather than constantly look outward for approval. Want to Start Raising Body-Confident Kids Today? 📘 Order the Books Raising Body-Confident Kids If you've ever caught yourself saying something to your kid about their body that sounded exactly like what your mother said to you, this book is for you. Raising Body-Confident Kids is a research-backed, judgment-free guide for parents who want to break the cycle of diet culture and body shame without swinging into toxic positivity or giving up all structure around food and movement. It answers the real questions parents are actually asking about Ozempic, about picky eaters, about what to say when your kid is being bullied for their body, and about social media influences. This is a practical, values-based game plan you can actually use, even if your own relationship with your body is still a work in progress. My One-of-a-Kind Body My One-of-a-Kind Body gives kids the language and understanding they need to care for their bodies with respect without fear, shame, or appearance-based messaging. Through inclusive illustrations and evidence-based health education, the book teaches body literacy, boundaries, and self-trust in a way kids can actually grasp. 👉 www.raisingbodyconfidentkids.com/books
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