Having a successful morning routine is all the buzz right now. Dr. Whitney breaks down why typical morning routines don’t work for her (or a lot of moms) and gives you an alternative that still allows you to have the benefits but none of the strain and guilt

Key takeaways:

• Typical morning routines for moms usually involve getting up several hours earlier than everyone else and don’t allow for families where that’s just not possible. They’re generally so involved and have so many forms of self-care within them that if you have a morning where your kiddo wakes up early (that’s every day over here), then you end up feeling defeated and angry when something doesn’t work out.

• An alternative is a daily ritual that you go through that gives you time to yourself and allows for a moment of reflection. And that can happen whenever you need it to. Whenever it actually CAN happen. Just like you’d plan your morning routine, you need to make space in your schedule to allow for this to happen.

• Why a DAILY ritual? It reminds us that we are the most important things in our own lives and if we aren’t supporting ourselves, we’ll end up resentful and burnt out because we’ll constantly be giving of ourselves instead of actually receiving anything. If we can receive for ourselves in a consistent way, then we’ll have more bandwidth, more time, more energy, and more mental capacity to be giving to OTHERS in a consistent way.

• What should it look like? Literally anything that allows you to be alone, quiet with your feelings, and to turn inward and practice mindful self-compassion and radical acceptance. Or even to just let your mind wander and be with yourself (to remind you how great you are!) It can also be something structured with journal pages from The Artist’s Way or meditations and mantras from the Mindful Mamas Club App. 

• When should I do it? Some people like to do it in the morning simply because it’s a season that they’re in where that works for them. Great! If not, maybe it’s when you go on a walk. Or in the shower (with the door locked!), as you’re driving home from work, taking an extra 5 minutes in the garage or driveway, or on your lunch hour when you decide not to check emails, but instead focus on yourself.

• How long should it take? 5-10 minutes of calm, unrushed time

• How do you make time for this in the day? This is where the Centered Life Blueprint comes into play. Decide to put yourself in the center of your life. That could look like putting aside efficiency or productivity for just a few minutes because you want to honor what you know your body and mind need. Or deciding that you’re only going to check your phone 4 times a day. Or planning a very simple meal one day a week to give yourself a little bit more margin. Or delegating tasks that don't need to be done by you.

Maybe that’s decluttering the stuff in your house so you spend less time cleaning up and more time with you. Or saying no to being on committees or opportunities that are not going to serve you well. Or boundaries on tech about when you’re responding to people.

It starts with deciding that you are worth taking care of. When that doesn’t happen, you turn into a burnt out stress ball. And burnt out, stressed out women have a really hard time being the best mom to their kids. Or wives to their husbands. Or business owners.