EVERYBODY LOVES A WOMAN WITH BOUNDARIES...UNTIL THEY DON'T

Modern Mommy Doc

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PUBLICATION DATE:

May 16, 2024

EVERYBODY LOVES A WOMAN WITH BOUNDARIES...UNTIL THEY DON'T

Modern Mommy Doc

CATEGORY: Creating the Life YOU Want

About Our Guest:

Whitney Casares, MD, MPH, FAAP, is a practicing board-certified pediatrician, author, speaker, and full-time working mom. Dr. Whitney is a Stanford University-trained private practice physician whose expertise spans the public health, direct patient care, and media worlds. She holds a Master of Public Health in Maternal and Child Health from The University of California, Berkeley, and a Journalism degree from California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo. She is also CEO and Founder of Modern Mommy Doc.

Dr. Whitney advocates for the success of career-driven caregivers in all facets of their lives, guiding them toward increased focus, happiness, and effectiveness despite the systemic challenges and inherent biases that threaten to undermine them. She speaks nationally about her Centered Life Blueprint, which teaches working caregivers how to pay attention to what matters most amid pressure, at multibillion-dollar corporations like Adidas and Nike, and at executive-level conferences. She is a spokesperson for the American Academy of Pediatrics and medical consultant for large-scale organizations, including Good Housekeeping magazine, Gerber, and L’Oreal (CeraVe). Her work has been featured in Forbes, Thrive Global, and TODAY Parenting. She is a regular contributor to Psychology Today.

Dr. Whitney practices medicine in Portland, Oregon, where she and her husband raise their two young daughters.

About the Episode:

In this episode, Dr. Whitney dives deep into why it’s so hard for women to hold their boundaries. We all know that boundaries are healthy, but it’s simply more difficult for women, especially moms, to set boundaries and keep them. This episode gives you practical tips on how to make it happen.

Episode Takeaways:

In the workplace, it’s very common for the buzzword of the week to be boundaries. It’s often discussed how good it is for women to have boundaries and how it makes them stronger. But once the boundaries are set in place and enforced, there’s often a different tune. Women get labeled as too rigid, overbearing, and too controlling. This episode is about why it’s so hard for women to hold their boundaries.

When we talk about women standing up for themselves in their home in regards to sharing the mental load, we’re really talking about setting boundaries. Without boundaries, they’re making sure everyone else is okay before they make sure they’re okay themselves. Without boundaries, you state your priorities and values, but do nothing when they aren’t honored.

More often than not, women don’t hold those boundaries because they’re worried about the reaction of others. They’re worried about the way their partner will react if they hold their own boundary around their time or, even at work, how a boss might react and the consequences that could happen when they make and keep a boundary. They don’t want to be seen as aggressive. And they don’t want to deal with the anger that will inevitably come, so they just don’t set the boundary in the first place.

Even back in the 90s, studies showed that women are judged more harshly when they set and keep a boundary as opposed to men.

How to stop the cycle of people pleasing and set and keep boundaries.
Remember you are a role-model for your kids. We see when they model our behavior all the time, whether good or bad. So ask yourself, what can I show them now so that it’s easier and more comfortable for them to make and keep boundaries when they are older.

Remember that things only change when you do things differently. Nothing changes if nothing changes. If you’re resentful because people are walking all over you and your time, it will continue in that same pattern until you make a change. And change causes friction.

Remember that it’s human nature to resist change, so those that you are impressing the boundaries upon will naturally try to buck that and keep you in your old status or pattern. If they are happy with the status quo, they aren’t going to like the change. Address their feelings when you start the boundary and be willing to accept their feelings.

Practice how you’re going to react to their anger or feelings. You have 3 options when you experience backlash. 1) Stand your ground and reaffirm your boundaries. 2) Compromise 3) Let it go and realize they might not be capable of reacting how you’d like them to.

CLARITY MATTERS: HOW EARLY AUTISM DETECTION CAN CHANGE A CHILD'S LIFELONG TRAJECTORY

By Dr. Whitney • December 17, 2025

About the Episode: In this episode, Dr. Whitney sits down with Dr. Jay Gargus and Dave Justus from NeuroQure to discuss the power of early clarity when it comes to autism detection and why earlier intervention can fundamentally change outcomes for childre n and families. Dr. Gargus explains the science behind early behavioral therapies and why their impact goes far beyond short-term skill-building. Research shows that early, evidence-based interventions can lead to measurable, lifelong improvements in IQ, so cial skills, independence, and educational placement, often determining whether a child can thrive in mainstream education or requires ongoing specialized support. The conversation also tackles a critical and often overlooked issue: access. Dave Justus shares the personal motivation behind NeuroQure’s work and explains why the test is being launched at cost, with installment plans and employer subsidies, while the team works toward insurance coverage. The goal is to prevent families from losing precious years waiting for answers. Together, they emphasize a hopeful message for parents: families don’t need to wait for a future “silver bullet.” We already have therapies that work and getting kids connected to them earlier can change the course of a lifetime. In this episode, we discuss: Why early autism detection leads to lifelong changes—not just short-term gains What a 17-point IQ difference actually means for education, independence, and quality of life How early intervention can shift developmental trajectories as early as 6 months The science and validation behind current autism therapies Why NeuroQure is pricing testing at cost while pursuing insurance coverage How early clarity can reduce long-term strain on families, schools, and healthcare systems This episode is a powerful reminder that timing matters and that early access to answers can make an extraordinary difference for children and the families who love them. About Our Guest: Dr. Jay Gargus, MD, PhD is a physician-scientist and nationally recognized expert in neurodevelopmental disorders, with decades of experience researching the biological underpinnings of autism. His work has focused on translating well-established science into meaningful, real-world interventions that can improve lifelong outcomes for children. Dr. Gargus emphasizes that early, evidence-based therapies are already available—and that connecting families to them sooner can fundamentally change developmental trajectories. Dave Justus is a parent and the founder of NeuroQure, whose work is driven by personal experience navigating delayed autism diagnosis and intervention. Motivated by the belief that early clarity can spare families years of uncertainty, Dave is focused on expanding access to early testing through cost-based pricing and ongoing efforts to secure insurance coverage. His mission is simple but powerful: ensure families don’t have to wait for answers that could change everything. Want to Start Raising Body-Confident Kids Today? 📘 Order the Book Order your copy of My One-of-a-Kind Body 👉 www.raisingbodyconfidentkids.com/books 🎁 Claim Your Free Bonus When you order on our site, you’ll also get access to a FREE video mini-course with five bite-sized lessons for parents. In just 25 minutes, you’ll walk away with: Simple, script-style ways to respond when your kid says, “I hate my thighs” How to talk about health without weight talk What to do when your own inner critic shows up How to interrupt diet culture at home The first step to raising a body-confident kid, even if you didn’t grow up as one 📩 Subscribe to The Modern Mommy Doc Podcast for more episodes on parenting with confidence and clarity. Leave a review using the hashtag #ModernMommyDoc.