Last week, we defined the six core areas successful moms are intentional about.

This week, we're focusing on the first of those core areas: getting intentional about our dreams and our goals.

What does goal-setting have to do with winning at motherhood? Everything. It gives us purpose and direction. It helps us keep moving toward the future when the present feels like poop in our hair or sticky fingers on our clothes from those little ones we have in-tow. 

Successful mamas dream big – really big. They do it for two reasons: 

1) They understand the value of passionate living. They see that, while it's important to embrace the season we're in now and to find contentment no matter our circumstances, living just for the day-to-day can be boring and defeating. They know that their lives mean more than laundry and work commutes. 

2) They want their kids to live passionately one day, too. They realize they are the most critical educators in their children's lives. They grasp that when their children see them working toward a goal and resiliently pursuing a dream, they will be inspired to reach further someday, too. 

What if Passionate Feels Too Far-Fetched for My Life?

This doesn't mean successful mamas all have crazy visions of being famous rockstars (though, if that's you, Mama, go for it. I mean, why not?). It means they have visions of what life could look like for them if they had the time and resources to design it more intentionally. It means they have something they want for their lives (a small business concept they can't shake, a vision of amazing relationships with their families, a dream of financial freedom, an idea they have to make other people's lives better). 

I'm not going to sit here and "self-help" you with a bunch of "reach for the stars" B.S. 

Life is Real 

There are barriers for each and every one of us to even thinking about the thing we actually want for our lives, much less to go out and grab it. I know that. You know that. And you know the things I'm talking about: things like a mountain of bills or sleep deprivation or a tantruming toddler. Or sexism. Or racism. Or generational poverty. 

Still, I'm convinced that it's not enough to settle for lives that are overwhelming, disappointing, and exhausting. Motherhood was meant to be better than that. We don't have to all be famous rockstars, but we can rock our lives, despite the chaos that fills them, by living them with purpose.

Understanding where we're going and why we’re going there is the foundation on which we determine our priorities. 

It helps us decide where to place our efforts and how to spend our time day by day. That's why we have to be crystal clear about the dreams that matter most to us – so clear in fact that we write them down and own them. 

It can be daunting to lay claim to our hopes and dreams for one reason: we’re afraid someone else won’t agree or won’t approve. Think about it, though, Mama. It would be crazy for you to let someone else’s opinions decide how your life is going to ultimately turn out, right?

I have a list of 10-year dreams I go back to day after day as I think about how I want to live my life (to give full credit, I developed these based on Rachel Hollis' method she describes in Girl, Stop Apologizing).

Here are my 10-year dreams:

I live completely debt-freeI am in the best health of my life —physical and mentalI am a New York Times best-selling authorI work for myself as a speaker, blogger, and businesswoman I travel the world extensivelyI am an exceptional wife and have a thriving marriageI have deep connections with my kids and amazing relationships with each of themI own a home with a view onto open water.I have close relationships with a community that I love and support and who loves and supports me. I give my best talents compassionately and generously to inspire other women to have social-emotional wellness for their families and financial freedom. 

A Little Too Big, You Say? 

Some of these may seem totally reasonable to you, maybe even too small. Some of these may seem way too big. Guess what? I DON'T CARE. They’re my dreams. Guess what else? You ALSO SHOULDN'T CARE if, when you write out what you’re hoping and dreaming above all odds for, someone else laughs or comments negatively about them. Why? Because they’re your dreams. No one else should get to tell you what’s silly or too ambitious for your life because it’s your life.

Once you’ve hammered out your dreams, it’s time to focus on your priorities. That's where we're headed next week. Join me!

Missed last week's blog on how to win at parenting without losing yourself and why it matters so much? You can read it here.